This is where I put up the stuff I couldn't catagorize.

Hawaiian GOOD LUCK TOTEM
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This totem has been sent to you for good luck. It has been sent around the world nine times so far. You will receive good luck within four days of relaying this totem.

SAY THAT FIVE TIMES REAL FAST.......(Try these at a party.)

Bake big batches of brown blueberry bread.

Which wristwatch is a Swiss wristwatch?

Mummies make money.

Crush grapes, grapes crush, crush grapes.

An elephant was asphyxiated in the asphalt.

This is a zither.

Fresh fried fish, Fish fresh fried, Fried fish fresh, Fish fried fresh.

There was a minimum of cinnamon in the aluminum pan.

Really leery, rarely Larry.

Big black bugs bleed blue black blood but baby black bugs bleed blue blood.

Elizabeth has eleven elves in her elm tree.

Aluminum lineoleum, aluminum lineoleum, aluminum lineoleum

Round the rugged rock, the ragged rascal ran.

Busy buzzing bumble bees.

Nat the bat swat at Matt the gnat.

Preshrunk silk shirts.

While we were walking, we were watching window washers wash Washington's windows with warm washing water.

A bloke's bike back brake block broke.

Good blood, bad blood, good blood, bad blood, good blood, bad blood.

Ripe white wheat reapers reap ripe white wheat right.

A skunk sat on a stump and thunk the stump stunk, but the stump thunk the skunk stunk.

A man takes the day off work and decides to go out golfing. He is on the second hole when he notices a frog sitting next to the green. He thinks nothing of it and is about to shoot when he hears, "Ribbit.9 Iron" The man looks around and doesn't see anyone. "Ribbit. 9 Iron."He looks at the frog and decides to prove the frog wrong, puts hisother club away, and grabs a 9 iron. Boom! he hits it 10 inches from the cup. He is shocked. He says to the frog, "Wow that's amazing. You mustbe a lucky frog, eh?" The frog reply's "Ribbit. Lucky frog." The man decides to take the frog with him to the next hole. "What do you think frog?" the man asks. "Ribbit. 3 wood." The guy takes out a 3 wood and Boom! Hole in one. The man is befuddled and doesn't know what to say. Bythe end of the day, the man golfed the best game of golf in his life and asks the frog, "OK where to next?" The frog reply, "Ribbit. Las Vegas."They go to Las Vegas and the guy says, "OK frog, now what?" The frog says, "Ribbit Roulette." Upon approaching the roulette table, the manasks," What do you think I should bet?" The frog replies, "Ribbit.$3000,black 6." Now, this is a million-to-one shot to win, but after the golfgame, the man figures what the heck. Boom! Tons of cash comes sliding back across the table. The man takes his winnings and buys the best room in the hotel. He sits the frog down and says, "Frog, I don't know how to repay you. You've won me all this money and I am forever grateful."The frog replies, "Ribbit, Kiss Me." He figures why not, since after all the frog did forhim he deserves it. With a kiss, the frog turns into a gorgeous 18-year-old girl. "And that, your honor, is how the girl ended up in my room."

It's once again time to vote for the Darwin Award nominees. As you know, these nominees will not be contributing to the gene pool. The 1997 nominees are:

NOMINEE #1 [San Jose Mercury News]

An unidentified man, using a shotgun like a club to break a former girl friend's windshield, accidentally shot himself to death when the gun discharged, blowing a hole in his gut.

NOMINEE #2 [Kalamazoo Gazette]

James Burns, 34, of Alamo, Mich., was killed in March as he was trying to repair what police described as a "farm-type truck." Burns got a friend to drive the truck on a highway while Burns hung underneath so that he could ascertain the source of a troubling noise. Burns' clothes caught on something, however, and the other man found Burns "wrapped in the drive shaft."

NOMINEE #3 [Hickory Daily Record]

Ken Charles Barger, 47, accidentally shot himself to death in December in Newton, N.C., when, awakening to the sound of a ringing telephone beside his bed, he reached for the phone but grabbed instead a  Smith&y___Wesson .38 Special, which discharged when he drew it to his ear.

NOMINEE #4 [UPI, Toronto]

Police said a lawyer demonstrating the safety of windows in a downtown  Toronto skyscraper crashed through a pane with his shoulder and plunged 24 floors to his death. A police spokesman said Garry Hoy, 39, fell into the courtyard of the Toronto Dominion Bank Tower early Friday evening as he was explaining the strength of the building's windows to visiting law students. Hoy previously had conducted demonstrations of window strength according to police reports. Peter Lawyers, managing partner of the firm Holden Day Wilson, told the Toronto Sun newspaper that Hoy was "one of the best and brightest" members of the 200-man association.

NOMINEE #5 [Bloomburg News Service]

A terrible diet and room with no ventilation are being blamed for the death of a man who was killed by his own flatulence. There was no mark on his body but autopsy showed large amounts of methane gas in his system. His diet had consisted primarily of beans and cabbage (and a couple of other things). It was just the right combination of foods. It appears that the man died in his sleep from breathing the poisonous cloud that was hanging over his bed. Had he been outside or had his windows been opened, it wouldn't have been fatal. But the man was shut up in his near airtight bedroom. According to the article, "He was a big man with a huge capacity for creating "this deadly gas." Three of the rescuers got sick and one was hospitalized.

NOMINEE #6 [AP, St. Louis]

Robert Puelo, 32, was apparently being disorderly in a St. Louis market. When the clerk threatened to call police, Puelo grabbed a hot dog, shoved it in his mouth, and walked out without paying for it. Police found him unconscious in front of the store-paramedics removed the six-inch wiener from his throat, where it had choked him to death.

NOMINEE #7 [Associated Press, Kincaid, W. VA]

Blasting Cap Explodes in Man's Mouth at Party. A man at a party popped a blasting cap into his mouth and bit down, triggering an explosion that blew off his lips, teeth and tongue, state police said Wednesday. Jerry Stromyer, 24, of Kincaid, bit the blasting cap as a prank during a party late Tuesday night, said Cpl. M.D.Payne. 'Another man had it in an aquarium, hooked to a battery, and was trying to explode it," Payne said. "It wouldn't go off and this guy said, 'I'll show you how to set it off.' "

AND FINALLY, NOMINEE #8!!! [Arkansas Democrat Gazette],

Two local men were seriously injured when their pick-up truck left the road and struck a tree near Cotton Patch on State Highway 38 early Monday morning. Woodruff County deputy Dovey Snyder reported the accident shortly after midnight Monday. Thurston Poole, 33, of Des Arc and Billy Ray Wallis, 38, of Little Rock are listed in serious condition at Baptist Medical Center. The accident occurred as the two men were returning to Des Arc after a frog gigging trip. On an overcast Sunday night, Poole's pick-up truck headlights malfunctioned. The two men concluded that the headlight fuse used on the older model truck had burned out. As a replacement fuse was not available, Wallis noticed that the .22 caliber bullet from his pistol fit perfectly into the fuse box next to the steering wheel column. Upon inserting the bullet, the headlights again began to operate properly and the two men proceeded on east-bound toward the White River bridge. After traveling approximately twenty miles and just before crossing the river, the bullet apparently overheated, discharged and struck Poole in the right testicle. The vehicle swerved sharply to the right exiting the pavement and striking a tree. Poole suffered only minor cuts and abrasions from the accident, but will require surgery to repair the other wound. Wallis sustained a broken clavicle and was treated and released. "Thank God we weren't on that bridge when Thurston shot his ball off or we might both be dead" stated Wallis. "I've been a trooper for ten years in this part of the world, but this is a first for me. I can't believe that those two would admit how this accident happened", said Snyder. Upon being notified of the wreck, Lavinia, Poole's wife asked how many frogs the boys had caught and did anyone get them from the truck.

DISHONORABLE MENTION:

In College Station, Texas, in a cemetery for the exclusive use of Texas Aggies, there's a headstone that reads: "Here lies ------. He lit a match to see if there was any gasoline left in his truck's tank. There was."